Torn Asunder

​by Julie Davenport

 “In this world you will have trouble . . .”
John 16:33 NIV 

All of us go through difficult times. Those times can range from small hurts and incidents we go through all the way to difficulties that are deeper and can threaten to tear out our hearts. 

These are the situations and people God has called me to come alongside. I feel drawn to those who are broken and hurting. I try to help others who have been through what I have been through and to comfort others the way the Lord has comforted me. My story is one that included healing from the effects of sexual sin and abuse.

​I awoke in the night a few weeks ago before ministering to a group of women who had walked through similar hurts in their lives. A word came to my mind that I couldn’t even remember for a moment when I had heard it. The word was “ASUNDER,” which is not a normal part of my everyday vocabulary. I thought, “I probably should get up and write this down, or I will forget.” I didn’t want to get up, so I just repeated it continually in my head: “asunder, asunder, asunder.” I went back to sleep and awoke again. This time a whole phrase came to me: 

“Wherefore
they are no more twain,
but one flesh.
What therefore God
hath joined together,
​let not man put asunder.”
Matthew 19:6 KJV ​

I still wasn’t quite sure what the Lord was trying to tell me, but when I awoke the next morning, I did some research. It is a somewhat archaic and uncommon word, and many people know it only from religious marriage ceremonies. “Asunder” is an adverb meaning “into separate pieces,”¹ like ripping a piece of paper in half. It also has a slightly stronger meaning where “asunder” is described as a particularly violent or forceful ripping. One other definition can be described as "poles asunder," like separated never to be reestablished, or like the "poles of the earth, so far apart to never be put together again."  That is a sad picture of a broken marriage.

Being “torn asunder” when used as an adjective is not a clean wound. It is jagged.

​The word is used again in the Bible when Judas took his own life: 

Now this man purchased a field with the reward of iniquity;
and falling headlong, he burst asunder in the midst,
​and all his bowels (intestines) gushed out.
Acts 1:18 KJV 

Judas had bought a field with the money he received for his betrayal of Jesus. Filled with remorse, Judas fell headfirst, and his body split open, spilling out all his intestines.

As these women who had been affected by infidelity and abuse shared their stories, I found some had great redemption stories in their marriages; some had lost their marriages through divorce or death; and some were trying to save their marriages. However, they all had one thing in common: at some point, their lives had been torn asunder by sin. They felt as if their guts were coming out.

When we think of a marriage and think about the phrase “let not man put asunder,” we often think of divorce or some outside force. However, sexual sin and abuse can tear a marriage apart from the inside, too. Other things can tear us apart inside, such as hurts from our childhood, having a child that is not living for the Lord, or losing a family member to cancer. Most of us have had traumas happen in our lives that have made us feel as if our insides are being torn asunder.

However, there is good news! Even when the wound is jagged and hard to heal, even when you have been crushed and broken to pieces by the trauma you have been through or are currently going through, you have a God who is able to heal. He made you for more than to live in bondage of past hurt.

​His word has many promises of what He will do when our hearts are broken and when we are torn asunder, feeling as if “our guts are literally coming out.” 

• The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. Psalm 34:18 NIV

• He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds. Psalm 147:3 NIV

 

• The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is on me, because the Lord has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor. He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners.

​            Isaiah 61:1 NIV

Maybe today you are whole, and this doesn’t really apply to you. Please know there are many around you who are hurting and broken, and you can be a part of their healing today by showing them love and care and concern.

​If you happen to be a woman in ministry who has been affected by sexual sin and abuse, I encourage you to talk to someone. This is not easy in the ministry. Through an online Facebook private page, small gatherings, and in one-on-one conversations, I endeavor for my ministry to be a place where you can feel safe, seen, and heard. Feel free to reach out to me at: [email protected].

¹"asunder." Merriam-Webster.com. Merriam-Webster, 2024. 
​Web. 13 November 2024. 

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If one word could depict a life, Julie Davenport’s would be “redemption.” As a child, Julie’s character was forged within a legacy of faith, godliness, and ministry, so when she married a charismatic young pastor on the fast-track to prominence, life was everything she’d dreamed it would be...on the outside. But inside, alone and hidden from view, Julie endured abuse, betrayal, and infidelities that spiraled to include miscarriage, cancer, divorce, mental illness, and eventually suicide. Julie is now an ordained AG minister who through speaking engagements and two daughters continues the legacy of ministry, God is using Julie’s life-story to validate His immeasurable grace and prove His power to redeem what Satan tried so hard to destroy.

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