“The quality of our lives,” stated my pastor during a recent sermon, “is determined by the quality of our relationships.” Nothing could be truer. Good friends and loving family are like islands in the fast-moving streams of life. They provide a place where we can temporarily dock from our duties, shuck off our shoes, and wiggle our toes in the warm sand of companionship. I call them “featherbed friends,” because they provide us with a soft place to land. How restoring it can be when we make room in our lives for those who support, encourage, and lift our spirits!

Unfortunately, not every relationship will be as restful. We all know those as well who, whether consciously or unconsciously, drain us dry if we let them. Somehow in our search for more respites during the daily rigors, we must learn to differentiate between the two, inviting more time in the first even as we learn to limit or, in some cases eliminate the latter.

The reality is that there will be only a few choice comrades throughout a lifetime who truly care and understand unconditionally enough to stay the course. I can tell you from experience that you can be the most popular person on the block—one with a Facebook full of friends—but very few real and restful ones. Likewise, you can spend your life constantly surrounded...continue

​I wish I could be more confident!

So many times I’ve whispered this prayer. Sometimes God asks us to do crazy things. Following Him requires a great deal of faith, and confidence is a good thing—or is it?

Confidence: a full trust; belief in the powers, trustworthiness, or reliability of a person or thing.

This culture heralds strong, confident women. But strength and confidence in what? In ourselves? We need to guard ourselves from this bad idea. What happens when we come to the end of our strength? Or when someone comes along who is more talented?

As a social worker, I have watched the feminist movement champion the power of femininity and self-reliance...continue reading.